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Subj: Monika Checking In!
Date: 3/25/2004 12:06 Pm Pacific Standard Time
From: MonyB
To: unknownuser@unknowndomain.com
Howdy all!!!! I thought I’d write and let you know Monika is alive and well!!! The surgeries are behind me and I’m cleared for dental and face. I went to both consultations yesterday and am really excited about losing the chiclets (Kennedy teeth) to match my smaller head and getting the facial treatments!!! Marg Helgenburger from CSI was in the dermatologists office yesterday. She is sooooooooo gorgeous. I do believe she was getting botox because she came through the waiting room with goo on her face and was covered in saran wrap. That was pretty nifty to see they have to work at their beauty too.
I’m really excited about the results of the surgeries. Sam’s going to think he robbed the cradle when I get home….well, he did! HA! The pain was intense and the recovery was worse then I had anticipated probably because of the loneliness from being separated from family. BUT, I am so thankful for the gift I’ve been given and am so glad to have been able to participate. My body truly reflects the young spirit inside Dr. Phil has given me in keys one and two! I’ve had a long time to reflect on my life and this challenge and will never EVER take for granted the gifts we have been given. Dr. Phil has given us the tools to not just lose a few pounds. He has literally given us the keys to change our lives and get our thinking right and teach us to respond with grace and resolve and make the seven keys as much a part of our lives as breathing is. I can’t imagine anyone of us griping or complaining about one aspect of this challenge if you stop and think about what we have been given. Hell, I wish I could throw rose petals on the ground when Dr. Phil and the producers walk in the room. They’ve put up with a lot of b.s. and still are determined to ensure we all succeed in spite of ourselves. So, to the producers and to Dr. Phil I apologize from the bottom of my heart if I have ever caused one moment of grief and/or made you question why you chose me to participate as a challenger.
You have all given me new life. I feel like I’ve had three births now….my literal birth as a baby, when I was saved as a christian and the gift of a new life Dr. Phil has given me in teaching me how to love myself and be my own best friend and grasp every second of every day for the rest of my life and be happier then I ever thought was possible in my life. I can’t tell you how much I love life now. I merely thought this challenge was a chance to lose a few pounds NEVER did I comprehend I was gaining a complete life and the weight loss was side effect of learning to love myself for the first time in my life. The gift of the extreme makeover is merely a physical means to making my exterior feel as beautiful on the outside as I know I am on the inside FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE!
I’ve thought about and been interviewed about people’s perception that this challenge and makeover has been easy and that we’ve had it so easy because of the resources of Dr. Phil, JJ, Robert and Dr. Lawlis and the surgeons and dr.’s in the world. I responded that we had these resources available to us in the challenge but so did all of America if they tuned in and followed the steps we’ve taken. The hard part about this has been having every pound of loss scrutinized on national tv. How easy can people think this has been to have been to any one of us and I feel personally to me because of being the one voted the least deserving person to stay in the challenge because I had lost the least amount of weight???? That just made my resolve more determined to succeed to prove them wrong and to myself that I was and did do this for ME! That day key one kicked in in a big way because prior to this challenge if one person didn’t think I was worthy I would have pulled a bin ladin and hid in a cave but to have 23.8% of America think I didn’t deserve to be in the challenge I would have given up and just preferred to lay down and die. So, to those detractors all I can say is look at me now!!!!!!! I read on the message boards that several people thought I had sold out because I accepted the makeover and apparently couldn’t be happy with myself if I had to change. To those folks all I can say is they can kiss my firm J-L ass (or rub it) J ! I could not have accepted this makeover if I was not 100% positive that my inner self was not in a place that I love myself and I don’t need a damned thing done to my body to love myself anymore then I do right now. Nor would I have done this if my body could not have endured the surgeries and recovery period. I’ve been through more medical evaluations (my first mammogram-I studied by going out in the streets here at the hotel and having the handler run over my boobs with their car) and know that if anyone here thought there was a minute chance I couldn’t handle this I wouldn’t have been accepted, in a flash. I had to go through the exact application process as that of someone who sent in a video and was given a second look. The surgeries and recovery haven’t been a breeze by any means but I’m 13 days from the second surgery and can truly say Monika is back in a big way!!!!! I still have stitches in my belly and boobs and it’s still a little difficult to get around, but what breasts and belly I have now, woo hoo! Dr. Perleman said my breasts were magnificent, I’m so proud I have even named the twins (not tellin’)!!!!! J hehehe! You know Sam has said for years that when I turned 40 he was going to trade me in on 2 20’s. I’ve always told him he wasn’t wired! Sam, be careful what you ask for. I’ve got the spirit and now the body (just got in a size 6 and it was a bit big) of a twenty year old and the life experience of a woman, so watch out world, Monika’s ready to fly!
So I know I just wrote a memoir but I wanted to let you all know how much this challenge has changed my life inside and out, a full 180! I appreciate and love having the opportunity to share this challenge with each and every one of you. What amazing lifelong brother/sister/friends you all are to me, challengers, producers and Dr. Phil especially!
I can’t wait to see you guys. I have no idea what’s in store. I do know I’m going home April 14 and my reveal is the 15th. So I’ll miss you guys like crazy in the next challenge in Palm Springs. I just look at it as I can’t run a mile lest my twins bounce up and ht me in the eyes and I just got rid of black eyes from the face lift! J I have to add to my brother/sister/friends on team one….GO BIG BLUE!!!!!!!! MAKE ME PROUD!!!!!!!
I love ya!
Mony
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